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This blog is about my daily experiences and the wisdom which I have gained from them. The postings will either be in the form of questions posed by me, Jules Arden or reflections of my life experience. The answers are given by Mr OWO, the resident wise guy and supported by other teachers inclined towards Eastern philosophy. Read more at my blog.

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Should I Marry Her?

by the editor — May 30th, 2010

Jules: Since our last posting was on who to marry and in continuation of that ‘hot” topic, here is another question: Should I marry her (or him) ?

Mr OWO: Socrates, the famous Greek philosopher response to such a question posed to him was -

“By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher..”

Jules: I wonder why he said that. What kind of wife did he have?

Mr OWO: He was married to a lady who was reputed to have a sharp tougue and quick temper. Guess what he said, when asked why he married the woman?

Jules: Now I see why he said what he said. Either way, in marriage to another person one would gain something. If not happiness, then it would be wisdom. So that explains why he ended up being such a great philosopher!

Mr OWO: While we are on the subject of love and marriage. You might appreciate this quote from him -

  • From the deepest desires often come the deadliest hate.

Jules: Strange that you are telling me this quote. I just read in the newspaper this news headline: “Killed by lover and gang”. You did think that if you love someone you would not harm the person.

Mr OWO: I think there is some confusion here between love and desire. I don’t blame you. There seems to be a thin line between the two. True love is unconditional. It is a love born out of kindness and concern for the other. Yes true love has elements of desire but it is stronger than desire because it can check or keep in line a desire that is not met. Desire on its own does not contain love. It is purely an emotional state. Desire is mistaken for love and is conditional upon another person fulfilling a selfish need. You can guess what could happen if a deep desire is not fulfilled and where there is no true love. Socrates wise words partly explains why the person who supposedly desires (which we now know is not true love) one could also kill his/her lover. So be a little careful when you make your choice.

Jules: How do I do that?

Mr OWO: That is easy. Just take your time to know the person better.

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